Monday, March 06, 2006

RAoK week: #1 A Sweetheart of a Complement

It seems we have a theme contest going on among some of my close personal friends who blog. Last week, Dipu gave us Turning Points. This week, Tai Chi master and the veg-a-matic himself, Andrew, has come up with a Random Acts of Kindness (RAoK) week. When I first read this, I thought, great...I will be focused this week on performing random acts so that I can then blog about them! But, actually, I think he also means acts that we have personally received from someone else. And, that's what I'll discuss today.

There are moments in my life, that clearly stand out. Times when I was pleasantly surprised or touched by another person's kindness and it has stayed with me to this day. These Random Acts of Kindness (RAoK) may seem small to some, but to me they meant the world.

RAoK #1: Simply a Sweetheart of a Complement
In high school, I was fairly well-liked, but I wasn't strong in the confidence department. I dated some, having a few serious long-term boyfriends, versus dating around. Partially, I think this was just my personality, but also I feel now that some of it had to do with me feeling like the people I would like to date didn't notice me or think of me in that way. The serious boyfriends I had in high school were in other classes than my own. I never even dated anyone from my own class. And, this made me wonder why no one asked me out. (Let me specify here that I graduated with a class of 63 people. Of those 63, I would only say about 4-5 were people I would have actually gone out with! But, still, it would have been nice to be asked...)

The scene was the annual spring band concert, my senior year. (Yes, I was a band nerd. I admit it!) Every year, the concert band would put on a big show, and at the end honor those seniors who were graduating. There were a lot of honors and recognition, and it was a wonderful evening. The final awards of the evening were for Band Sweetheart and Beau. The popular kids made fun of these awards, calling it the "Dork of the Year" awards. But, I always felt it was a really nice thing because a lot of people who wouldn't be recognized school wide got a moment to shine.

I had been shocked when I was nominated this year, almost feeling like it was a joke or something. I didn't get nominated for the popularity awards, typically. I think I definitely flew too far under the radar, as well as associated with too many of the unpopular kids to qualify in the eyes of the popular crowd (of which I did have several friends). But, even among the band nerds, I wasn't considered the most popular. Most likely, this was because my passion for band faded dramatically when marching season was over and I had to put away the batons for my horn.

After we played our concert tunes, the Band Sweetheart and Beau were announced. And, I was not surprised that I didn't get the Sweetheart award. But, I was thrilled because one of my closest friends did. She had served as drum major and had really put a lot of time and work into our band that year, and I felt she was so deserving of it. She wasn't one to get these type of awards either, and so I celebrated with her because in a small way it felt like a victory for me too.

Then, we played our final song and the curtains closed. As we walked back to the band hall to put up our horns, I felt the familiar finger flick of one of my favorite guy pals on my shoulder. When I turned around, he was there smiling at me. Mike and I had always been friends, but this year we had gotten much closer since we shared a lot of the same classes. He could make me laugh to the point of tears and teased me incessantly. I truly adored him and harassed him just as much back, to the point that it often made my jealous boyfriend unhappy. Looking back, I suppose there was an attraction between the two of us that my boyfriend picked up on, although I never really thought about it or acted upon it at that time. Mike didn't really look like my type or seem like anyone I'd be paired off with, but our minds seemed to share a connection and so did our senses of humor.

As we put our horns away, Mike turned to me and asked,
"So, what did you think of the awards tonight?"
Puzzled, I replied, "Oh, that...wasn't it awesome that Mary won? I am so happy for her!"
Mike paused and then took a moment, waiting for me to look up and catch his eyes.
"Well, I think you are more the sweetheart type, to be honest. And, you definitely should have won."
My face flushed, and I awkwardly mumbled something like, "oh, no! I don't deserve that" and "you're crazy." Because Mike loved to tease me, I kept expecting some come-back or some joke to happen. Instead, he gave me his most sincere smile and gently patted my shoulder and walked away.

It sounds silly, but it was probably one of the nicest things that could have been said to me during that period of my life. A boy from MY class actually thought I was "sweetheart material?" And, someone I thought the world of as well?

In just a few words, he managed to make me feel so special and pretty inside that evening. And, I still blush when I remember this moment...


Blogger DebbieDoesLife said...

I graduated with 67 people!! And, I agree you are the sweetheart type.

7:38 AM, March 07, 2006  
Blogger Tamara said...

That's awesome. I wonder if he has any idea how it impacted you?

7:55 AM, March 07, 2006  
Anonymous Theresa said...

Those are the moments in life that you never, ever forget. Aren't they awesome!

8:48 AM, March 07, 2006  
Anonymous Nicole said...

How nice! It is amazing how small acts sometimes change our corner of the world in big ways.

And I am finding more and more in common with you... band geeks unite!

1:24 PM, March 07, 2006  
Blogger Crazy MomCat said...

Awww...thanks Debbie!
And, Tam, I'm sure he doesn't. I know he could tell it took me off guard though. He later went on to Westpoint and I've only bumped into him once since then. Still, it's a wonderful memory of a great friend that I am glad I have...

4:25 PM, March 07, 2006  
Blogger Masked Mom said... sweet! You know I'm a sucker for the high school sweetheart (or almost sweetheart) stuff...:)

4:46 PM, March 07, 2006  
Blogger Viamarie said...

During those days, words like this could really melt our heart. I wonder if kids nowadays are still able to express themselves in a sweet and touching manner.

5:31 PM, March 07, 2006  
Blogger Lisa said...

This has me trying to find some way to incorporate the American Pie line..."There was this one time - at band camp...." LOL

What a great moment! I love moments like that when they come seemingly out of no where.

5:50 PM, March 07, 2006  
Blogger FRIDAY'S CHILD said...

It's funny sometimes when you come to think of it that though we have reached this stage in life, such kind words tickle us. Such lovely words affect our well-being. It is amazing to know that kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless.

6:33 PM, March 07, 2006  

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