Service, sans the pants...
Worse than that, now, I come back from our family festivities run-down, over-stuffed, and void of all cleverness. Instead, I will entertain you with a tidbit of a conversation from my son on our way home because it is much more entertaining that delving into my family's messed up dynamics.
We were 10 minutes from home when my daughter could absolutely not wait a minute more to go to the bathroom. So, we stopped at the closest, most reasonably-clean-considering convenience store for a quick "pee-run." When I returned to the car, my husband was chuckling and had my son repeat their conversation from moments before. It went a little something like this:
"Dad? You know how that sign says No Shirt, No Shoes, No Service?"
"Well, what about the pants?"
"What about the pants? Do you think they SUSPECT you'll be wearing
"Do you mean they EXPECT us to wear pants?"
"Yeah, do they expect you to wear pants?"
"Well, yes. People usually do wear pants."
"What about (sister's name)? She never likes to wear pants. She takes hers off all the time...all her clothes."
Once I heard this, I added, "I'm sure they never accounted for someone like
"Yeah, Mom. I think you're right," he added.