Number Two...Go towards the light!

I swore that I wouldn't be another mommy blogger who talks about poop, but here I go. I solemnly vow to keep these posts to a minimum if at all possible.

My son has had some weird ailments the past few weeks. After having strep with no symptoms, aside from a headache and not eating, he returned back to school this week. But, he still wasn't eating well and complained of stomach aches now and then, which me, mother and designated worrywart, in my usual worry mode.

This morning, we were standing at the bus stop chatting, when a neighbor friend mentioned that her son had been complaining of a stomach ache a lot lately. She had been really worried about him and suddenly it dawned on her. When was the last time her son had pooped? And it turned out that was his whole problem.

Those with older kids may have had this moment, where you realize that you have no idea when your child has gone or if they have gone at all lately. When they are babies and toddlers you are up close and personal with their poop whether you like it or not. If my daughter has five poops in a day, you better believe I will be telling my husband all about it when he gets home and planning just when I will be starting potty training up no matter what age she is. But, my son? Well, my son is halfway to seven. I trust that if he needs to go, he will...and that's that.

So, my neighbor friend starts talking about the story of the little girl who played Carol Ann on the Poltergeist movies. I had remembered she'd died not long after those movies and I knew there was a lot of urban legend that has circulated surrounding her death. Apparently, she died from a bowel obstruction that caused a rupture and brought on septic shock.(I did research this an it appears to be true.) Her parents and doctor thought she just had the flu, until it was too late. Surgeons could not save her. Her own poop had actually flooded her body and poisoned her to death.

As I watched my dear son get on the bus, I felt sick inside. Because, I had no idea when the last time was that my kid pooped. And, his behavior lately indicates this could be the source of his problems. You know, these are the parenting moments when you really know why you are getting gray hairs and that crease in the middle of your forehead is starting to resemble the Grand Canyon.

And, so I sit here fighting my instinct to humiliate him horribly by running up to the school with Metamucil in hand. But, I will not. I will trust that he'll be fine and I'll usher him home from the bus to a nice snack of fibrous fun and have a big Q&A about his bowel movements as of late and the importance of pooping regularly. He will be embarrassed, but his Mom will be able to breath a sigh of relief and stop thinking about phantomous poops and how her kid is growing up way too fast for her comfort.