Hook, line and...SUCKER!
It happens time and time again. My husband and I get sucked into another season of The Bachelor. My husband loves to tease me, because for several seasons in a row, the ending would unfold and I would very predictably get totally irritated with the misleading editing. Disappointed with the results, I would vow to never, EVER, watch the show again.
And, then, there I was the very next season...like a sad fish hooked to the line again--pathetically flopping about thinking I have an inkling about which girl the bachelor is going to choose THIS time. Ahhh...the fool that I am!
This season, I kept my cool a little longer. I kept my cards to my chest. I didn't let on the bachelorette for which I was really rooting. I couldn't handle the open disappointment of another let-down, not even in front of my husband.
My husband, unlike previous seasons, made his vote known very early on--by way of a t.v. crush on Sadie, "the virgin." The cute personality, the cleavage, the turned up nose and innocent poise---that's all he needed and he was smitten. And, I'll admit, I was sort of jealous. I mean, I can compete and even win in the cleavage department But, my friends, the virginity? Look, I wasn't a wild one and was just almost that "pure" myself when I got married, but that has been gone for many, many years now! And, that's just something I ain't gettin' back...like, evah!
And, I'll admit here now that I was rooting for Sadie too. How could I not? My childhood dog was named Sadie. Her middle name is the same as my own. And, home girl DID have better cleavage than her counterpart. One voluptuous woman to another, I had to give her props!
And, that alone should have been our cue that she was never going to be chosen in the end. Mr. Sensitive/Nice Guy Prince Bachelor actually picked Jen the Coach's daughter and we never saw it coming. I did, however, make a last minute call on it after a very close fingernail analysis on the teasers where they showed the ring on the winning bachelorette's hand. (Oh my word, how did I EVER live without a DVR, I ask you?)
But, what irritated me more in the end was that Mr. Sensitive/Nice Guy Prince Bachelor waffled with his proposal. He pulls out a ring and waits until poor Jen almost goes into cardiac arrest at the sight of it, explains how it is a family ring, and then tells her he is not ready to give it to her? Please, Prince Lorenzo! Wasn't that a little cruel to do?
But, wait! What was this? Then, he put the ring on her hand after all? Hello? What did this mean? Was it an engagement? Because if it was not, you've really screwed up Prince Borgie! You don't put a ring THAT substantial on a girl's hand and not expect her to think she's engaged!
Pissed! I was pissed that he waffled and didn't at least make it a fairy tale ending for school teacher Jen, even if she was my second choice! I almost said the words again--I'll NEVER, NO NEVER watch this show again.
Suddenly, the screen flashed dramatically to next season's bachelor. And, swoon, he's a marine with perky pecs. Oh, my! And, he's an Iron Man athlete too? Wait, was that a uniform? I wonder if he's going to be a slick bachelor like Travis or a nice-guy like Andrew or the Prince? And, goodness, what nice teeth he has!
Oh...no...look out folks. Here we go again!
And, then, there I was the very next season...like a sad fish hooked to the line again--pathetically flopping about thinking I have an inkling about which girl the bachelor is going to choose THIS time. Ahhh...the fool that I am!
This season, I kept my cool a little longer. I kept my cards to my chest. I didn't let on the bachelorette for which I was really rooting. I couldn't handle the open disappointment of another let-down, not even in front of my husband.
My husband, unlike previous seasons, made his vote known very early on--by way of a t.v. crush on Sadie, "the virgin." The cute personality, the cleavage, the turned up nose and innocent poise---that's all he needed and he was smitten. And, I'll admit, I was sort of jealous. I mean, I can compete and even win in the cleavage department But, my friends, the virginity? Look, I wasn't a wild one and was just almost that "pure" myself when I got married, but that has been gone for many, many years now! And, that's just something I ain't gettin' back...like, evah!
And, I'll admit here now that I was rooting for Sadie too. How could I not? My childhood dog was named Sadie. Her middle name is the same as my own. And, home girl DID have better cleavage than her counterpart. One voluptuous woman to another, I had to give her props!
And, that alone should have been our cue that she was never going to be chosen in the end. Mr. Sensitive/Nice Guy Prince Bachelor actually picked Jen the Coach's daughter and we never saw it coming. I did, however, make a last minute call on it after a very close fingernail analysis on the teasers where they showed the ring on the winning bachelorette's hand. (Oh my word, how did I EVER live without a DVR, I ask you?)
But, what irritated me more in the end was that Mr. Sensitive/Nice Guy Prince Bachelor waffled with his proposal. He pulls out a ring and waits until poor Jen almost goes into cardiac arrest at the sight of it, explains how it is a family ring, and then tells her he is not ready to give it to her? Please, Prince Lorenzo! Wasn't that a little cruel to do?
But, wait! What was this? Then, he put the ring on her hand after all? Hello? What did this mean? Was it an engagement? Because if it was not, you've really screwed up Prince Borgie! You don't put a ring THAT substantial on a girl's hand and not expect her to think she's engaged!
Pissed! I was pissed that he waffled and didn't at least make it a fairy tale ending for school teacher Jen, even if she was my second choice! I almost said the words again--I'll NEVER, NO NEVER watch this show again.
Suddenly, the screen flashed dramatically to next season's bachelor. And, swoon, he's a marine with perky pecs. Oh, my! And, he's an Iron Man athlete too? Wait, was that a uniform? I wonder if he's going to be a slick bachelor like Travis or a nice-guy like Andrew or the Prince? And, goodness, what nice teeth he has!
Oh...no...look out folks. Here we go again!
posted by Crazy MomCat @ 10:17 PM
4 Comments:
I just can't watch... The first season did me in...
I only watched the first two, and the last one. Heh, I've got the system beat! I have to say, I am TOTALLY disappointed in his choice. All Jen wanted was to be a princess, but all Sadie said was that she was in love with him. I kept hollering at the TV that he just made a huge mistake. LOL
I, too, am smitten with our Navy Doctor. MmmMMmm. I am wondering if he'll find anyone that will meet up to his standards just in physique. Still, he'll be nice to see on TV. :D
I was surprised, too. I thought he was a little turned off by the coach's periwinkle shirt and would not want a man with that lack of style in his family. But I doubt they'll actually get married...
I think a pretty overwhelming majority of the Bachelor viewing population was disappointed in his choice. It is pretty much a guarantee that these relationships won't work out in the long run though, so good for Sadie that she can go out there and find someone who doesn't have to go on TV to find his "dream girl".
And dang, that next bachelor really *is* les HOTT!! I so want to sign my sister up for it ;)
Post a Comment
<< Home