willpower to the wasteside!

I had planned to dazzle you with stories of my willpower today, giving you tales of how I hadn't had a coke in 3 days and I've been controlling myself with this awesome apple cake my son and I made sitting in my kitchen. I was going to talk about how the power is all in me and how I feel so optimistic about giving up caffeine, losing weight, and oh hell maybe one day finding the cure for cancer. (Why not, while I'm on that high, right?)

Only, day three was THE DAY from hell and that coke sure tasted FREAKIN' good about midway through the day. SIGH.

A smattering of my past 24 hours:

• Didn't sleep again last night until very late. Got up and cleaned on my closet until 2 a.m. in a frenzy of insomniatic productivity.
  
• Finally got to sleep, only to be awakened by my son at a quarter of seven this morning. Son had a scowl that signals a really bad morning and he managed to deliver on that.
  
• Got into an argument with my hubby via email and cell phone that wasn't pretty.
  
• Yelled at son for being really, really nasty to his sister all morning. Made huge threats. Saw he was going to call me on those threats...tried to plan what the heck I could take away to make a statement.
  
• Found out from a friend that her girls won't be coming to son's birthday--his most favorite friends--because they'll be out of town. Hid the fact from grumpy son because I was fearful of the wrath of disappointed grumpy boy on a day when I'm already really "beat down."
  
• Also found out from friend that my son's NOT in her daughter's VBS class, even though we registered early (but, this is resolved now, thankfully).
  
• Heard from husband that his job situation is even more tangled and confusing and he has even more pressure on him. (I still count my blessings he has choices right now, don't get me wrong.)
  
• Son kept up with the "testing" of my fragile mental state. Gave the final ultimatum to him, and then took away his swim playdate for the afternoon. Had to explain this standoff, embarrassingly, to his friend's mom who now things my son is Damien the Omen child or something.
  
• On the way to run errands, son melted down from all the battles during the day and began crying because some workers cut down too many trees near our house. ("I don't like those workers, ANYMORE, Mom! They are SO MEAN!") Poor kid, he was so tired...
  
• Took son to pick out his b'day invites and cake (yes, I had to do this for him today of all days because it has to be done). Tried to improve the day by giving him a cookie at the bakery and talked about starting over.
  
• Decided to stop at a farmer's market on the way home to get home-grown tomatoes to make fresh salsa. While there, noticed that I was the only one under the age of 80 at the place. When I got to the checkout, the only OTHER person under the age of 80, the teen checker girl, tells me an old lady just backed into my SUV and drove away, not even seeing the checker girl yelling to her to stop. Find my gas guzzling mamouth has now got huge scratches deep into the paint in the back bumper.
  
• Have to call hubby on a hard day and deliver this news. Not fun, but he was really nice about it as it wasn't my fault.
  
• But, by the time we got home, he was already back at it, which resulted in the Playstation going away and several timeouts and punishment upon punishment.
  
• Son let up after a serious talk and I saw hope. Husband called. Then, within 30 minutes, son started back in and got sent to his room until Dad got home. (I promise, my son is a good kid--he just had a REALLY rough day people!)
  
• Dad battled it out with son most of the night until about 30 minutes before bedtime when I think God saw we'd had enough and lifted the dark cloud over our house. Son went to bed calm and thankfully my daughter did too.

Speaking of DARK clouds, ironically the dark clouds brought the one ray of LIGHT today! We actually got a nice long rain! My Crepe Myrtles feel special again! There, I ended on a less negative note. Back on the coke wagon tomorrow, my friends!